Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Christmas, Heathens, Leprechauns, Kool-Aid and more


Today I went to the mall after not having traversed through that little corner of hell in a while. During the week it's much less of a den of evil than on the weekends when all the troll creatures and mall goons make an appearance - along with their entire extended family. The mall has become a place where I dread to go. On the one hand it's really practical because you can do all your shopping in relative comfort due to the wide variety of shops and prices, AC, and security.

During or leading up to the holidays, the mall also becomes a place of sparkly lights, fairy dust, Christmas shopping, promotions and limited editions. Every year I count on the decorations being magical and creative - but more than anything, I'm looking for magical. There was one year when it was so magical I actually took pictures by the big tree at the display area. There was another year when I couldn't help but be blown away by the cuteness and baby magicalness of the decorations around and about the mall - there were stuffies and lovelies everywhere!

About 3 years ago it all started going downhill and eventually just went to the Devil. It all began with the alien poo decor fiasco of '06. Instead of sparkly magic they gave us bobbles in piles that resembled strategically placed poo in an assortment of colors - ranging from alien green to ET purple. To say that there was no magic was a kind understatement. It was weird, bizarre and freaky. It was creative in a way only Stargate Atlantis and Star Trek have been, and disturbing in the way Mars Attacks made us laugh and question at the same time. Where was my magic?

I started thinking about the people who were paid an alien load of colorful, sparkly bills to come up with the concept, outline what they wanted, travel and buy tons and tons of "decorations", only to produce a "masterpiece" not worthy of competing against a 1st grader's macaroni arts and crafts Christmas tree.

This year I believe someone was desperate. Desperate to get it over with and run home, that is. The theme is leprechauns, lucky charms and horse shoes. Really. I'm not joking. I can feel right now that you're thinking you must have read it incorrectly, so I'm going to say it again: leprechauns, lucky charms and horse shoes. Right. Of course. I forgot. Leprechauns were the baby Jesus' sitters, lucky charms are what the little tike's mobile was made of, and horse shoes were the infant Jesus' first toys. Wait, maybe that was Santa. Well, it had to have been someone's because how else would that have passed as a Christmas theme?

Way to make everyone, even little children and babies, completely forget what Christmas is about. Why focus on love, family, magic, caring, and the Savior's birth, when you can focus on weird little men with unruly eyebrows and beards, wearing green outfits that make Robin Hood and his Merry Men look as straight as Russell Crowe throwing a phone. I guess it's up to us individuals to make our homes as lovely and magical as possible and channel out the crazy leprechaun madness of this year's heathen Kool-Aid they're trying to make us all drink.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

Criative in Stargate Atlantis and Star Trek way???? You're Mean!!! Hahahahaha
But I do agree with the lame decorations...
Bjsss Tati.

Unknown said...

Oh, I could not agree more about non-magical decorations!!

Last year my christmas cheer was totally snuffed out by the 'Santa at the beach' theme the mall made so extensive an investment in... which basically was a million stuffed/bearded doll-men (think stuffed skin colored stockings to get an idea of the quality) in red and white prisoner striped beach shorts holding little tropical drinks with slices of fruit on them.

I'm guessing the major investment actually went to the TONS of sand under the dolls everywhere. As if the beaches are not 15 minutes away. Not a leaf of holly or even a sparkle in sight! UGH!